6 Dragons Kung Fu Style

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Self defense: 10 correct attitudes during a quarrel - Article image

Self defense: 10 correct attitudes during a quarrel

The only warrior able to subdue the opponent without even having to touch him is the one who uses the intelligence.

Continuing the speech of the first level personal defense (the most "bland"), let's review some tips about the right attitude to keep in order to avoid a common lite in a physical confrontation.

So let's see what is right to remember in a self-defense situation:
  • First, we must forget our pride, we have nothing to demonstrate to those who are in front of us, nor to those who are with us (known or unknown they are); we must prove to ourselves that we are good and strong enough to control our instincts (fear, wariness, etc.)
  • The calm as wrath is contagious, we have to maintain a quiet, transparent but determined attitude; let's close a little our eyes, let's straighten our back (without widening shoulders) and let's use a calm gesture (descriptive, gentle but not invading the space of others); at the same time, we can use our hands to hire one of the undeclared defensive mobile guards of the 6DKF (anonymously protecting eyes, mouth and nose)
  • We have to use clear syntactic constructs and simple words; we must adopt a tone of voice peaceful, slow and at the same time assertive (with ample pauses); we have to modulate the height of the voice with slight volume changes to focus on what is most important (without being threatening)
  • Anger fastly decrease; we must completely slow down our pace (speed of speech, movement, etc.); in this way we will gain time and give opportunity to our "opponent" to lose decision and to reflect on what he is doing (as long as it is only fury to move his actions)
  • We must not show any sensation / emotion; no fear (eg. hesitations), no compassion (eg. paternalistic attitudes), no resentment (eg. verbal aggression), no fun (eg. desire to fight); nothing, we must be impenetrable and aseptic as the diamond
  • Last but not list, let's try (if possible) to appear as an integral part of the context to which our aggressor belongs, let's identify with him and with his point of view; We do not try to impose ourselves or our way of seeing things but rather choose to show "closeness" (if not even "membership")
The speech:
  • Who speaks does not fight; until the end of the danger we never have to cease to oppose dialogue to aggressions; let's ask for motivations / explanations, let's compose simple questions to which it is unconsciously imperative to answer
  • We must demonstrate not to accept but to understand what drives our "adversary" to behave in this way; we need to connect his motivations to ours but without pretending to determine who is right and who is wrong
  • We can gently invite our interlocutor to lower the tones, asking for example why he feels the need to shout, to be so agitated (etc.); we must force him to describe his point of view keeping actively working his brain
All these details in a stress situation are difficult to handle and put into practice but let's focus on the fact that, in the worst case, we will not have a second chance to do the right steps.

The time for preparation is now, the one for discipline is every day, the one for concentration will be the self defense moment.

In the next article we will see some examples of advanced psychological techniques.
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